The kitchen was a mess after dinner. Claire wanted help with her homework. Dad needed his eye drops put in. And as darkness fell, Michael was still outside tinkering with our jinxed lawn mower.
I wanted to slip away. But I stayed and sat at the kitchen table with stories rolling around in my head like a handful of marbles. This goes on all day; the stories rolling part. Not the sitting.
So,while Claire showed me her math page, I scribbled words on a notepad. And then my eyes glazed over; find the circumference using 22/7, or pi. There's a reason why I taught second grade all those years. I know we covered basic fractions, but my memory is leaning toward those regrouping lessons...Okay, boys and girls, let's do this together. Mr. One has too many people in his house so some of them need to move next door to Ms. Tens' duplex. Then we add those people up and bring them down to hang out together under the streetlight and... I've always had a way with words, but with numbers, oh the doubt, even after testing into honors trig in high school. I asked to be taken out. It made my head spin.
I jotted, Claire multiplied and added, the homework got done. The kitchen is clean. And the sweet sound of Michael's saxophone is swinging Dad to sleep upstairs, eye drops in.
I get it. Sometimes I have to wait for things, like the right time to write, but most of the time my wonderful life is happening in perfect time. It's just that sometimes my eyes are only half open to see the masterpiece which I've created.
Take a tour of the life you've created; it's good right now. That's the gist of the conversation I had today with my dear friend, Neeny.
I mean, there was more. There's always more.
wonderful that you can realize that in the cotidian...i'm just realizing it after 4 long years. i think that there is an art to learning to see, learning to be still enough so that you have the presence of mind to see.
ReplyDeleteSo true.. I had a moment myself today: The inner clouds (=doubts) moved aside and let the sunlight (=confidence) break through and highlight a sky (=soul) of a deep, royal blue (=loyalty). In Germany, the color 'blue' also stands for faithfulness. Being faithful in a relationship is vital. One tends to forget something sometimes though: Being loyal and faithful to oneself first. Acknowledging one's creation: I am here, I made it, I was the one, I created the space I breathe in, I am not hurting, I am free, I eat, I sleep, I laugh, I love, I live - what a great achievement!!! :-) Thanks for reminding me, Betsy (I had the most wonderful visit with you guys, you are a woman full of miracles, inspiring, heart-warming and so true! - Thank you for sharing YOU with ME!!)
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for your thoughts! It means the world to me to hear what other people are thinking about, connecting to, dreaming of...I love "learning to be still enough so that you have the presence of mind to see."
ReplyDeleteAnd..."I am free, I eat, I sleep, I laugh, I love, I live -what a great achievement."
Namaste,
Bets