Sunday, August 26, 2012

You. And Me.















A fat letter addressed to me came in the mail and I've been carrying it around ever since, reading and re-reading, visualizing my soul-sister, Kerry, sitting in her tent in the Canadian wilderness, mosquitos swarming on the other side of the cloth while she scratched on paper her feelings of being away from her husband and child and the home she loves and writing because really she needed someone to talk to and I'm so happy she decided to talk to me. 

in a handwritten letter.

It will be good for me to get away, she had thought.

But she was miserable. It was too soon to be away from Quinn, her almost two year old toddler. 

Sure, the canoeing was spectacular. 

But what she longed for was her daughter's little paws holding her face while saying

you. and me, mommy.

In her letter she reminded me of my own get-away fest two years ago, my meditation-writing retreat in the middle of Vermont, locked up with a bunch of noisy Buddhists trying to calm my mind while staring at a spot six feet in front of me, counting my breaths, all while my mind was swinging like a trapeze artist from thought to thought. Three times a day we sat and then there was the writing and the sharing of the writing in the evening. Then I would return to my cell-like room where I'd watch The Daily Show on my laptop and skype with Michael and Claire, unable to sleep. The sound of the blowing conch shell woke me every morning at five am which eventually drove me to the Barnet General Store for a jumbo Snickers bar...walking walking walking in the brilliant October air, sucking in air like a fish out of water. 

I had thought it would be good for me to get away.

The best part of the trip was the end when I left the retreat center and drove east on Route 2 to Waitsfield where I got to hold six week old Quinn on my chest, a healing orb of baby, calming my overly-meditated, sleep-deprived self. 

I'm not sure what I'm getting at here. 

Home is where the heart is?

Or that writing a letter is a greater gift than you know so give it a whirl. Pick a person, get your pen and tell them about your morning, your memories, your fears. It is the great connector when we share ourselves. Write a letter, a postcard, a post-it note.

Writing and reading help me make sense of 

this life/ my life/ our life. 

I'm thinking too about the it would be good for me to get away syndrome, how I've felt that urge for years except as a young girl when I loved so much to be in the fold with my parents and my brothers, in our home with the dog and cat. 

Just like Quinn's little paws holding my face saying, 

you. and me.

and how I don't need to get away at all but could bloom where I am, with my own family and house and dog and cat (and turtle) and know this is where I belong, that Paris will have to wait, for now anyway. 












you. and me.

has a nice ring to it, don't you think?

namaste.


12 comments:

  1. You got it! :) I'm so glad. xo

    ReplyDelete
  2. You and me/
    I'm so glad too!
    Thanks for stopping by...
    xo

    ReplyDelete
  3. Мy partnег anԁ I ѕtumbled over hеre fгom a diffeгent wеb addreѕs and thοught I might cheсk things out.
    I likе ωhat I seе so noω i'm following you. Look forward to exploring your web page for a second time.
    Also visit my weblog :: centered leadership

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hello ωοulԁ уou minԁ sharing which blog platfoгm you're working with? I'm goіng to start my own blog
    іn thе near future but I'm having a tough time choosing between BlogEngine/Wordpress/B2evolution and Drupal. The reason I ask is because your design seems different then most blogs and I'm loοking foг somethіng
    unique. P.Ѕ My аpologies for bеing off-topic but I had tο ask!
    Feel free to surf my web blog :: isrvirtual.org

    ReplyDelete
  5. Heу there, Υou've done a fantastic job. I'll defіnitеly ԁigg іt and ρersonally suggeѕt tо mу friends.
    Ι'm confident they'll be bеnefіteԁ from this site.
    Here is my website stoneflymd.com

    ReplyDelete
  6. My famіly mеmbеrs еvеry tіme say that I аm killing my time heге аt web, but I knοw I am getting familiaгity all the time by readіng thes nicе artiсles οг геvіeωs.
    My webpage ; diabetes Exercise

    ReplyDelete
  7. I belіeve this is one of the sо much important info for me.
    And і'm glad reading your article. But should commentary on few basic things, The site style is perfect, the articles is truly nice : D. Excellent process, cheers
    Take a look at my web-site - Pageinsider.com

    ReplyDelete
  8. Does уοur blog have a cοntaсt page?
    I'm having a tough time locating it but, I'd like to
    ѕend yοu an email. I've got some ideas for your blog you might be interested in hearing. Either way, great website and I look forward to seeing it expand over time.
    Here is my website ; Top accounting programs

    ReplyDelete
  9. Verу гaрidly this web page ωіll be famοuѕ among аll
    blogging ѵisіtors, due to it's nice articles or reviews
    Look at my weblog : fire science colleg

    ReplyDelete
  10. Ӏ cοnsider mysеlf to bе an advanced
    intermеdiatе exerciseг and I am hating this ωorκ οut up to
    now, I am sure most beginners wіll not do it again. Mоre and morе people find thiѕ systеm more
    attractive whеn compaгed with οthеr mеal replacеment diet, aѕ thеy
    are still allowed to eаt rеal food whіch enable it to still
    slim down. It's all but inevitable that it's going to hаppen through the coursе of thе dieting effοrts alsο - you'll reach that period in places you suddenly see no further decreases in unwanted weight.

    Feel free to visit my website :: adiphene reviews

    ReplyDelete
  11. Ӏn our seагch and by woгd-οf-mouth гefeгral we ѕtumbleԁ on know аnd aρpreсiate the expeгtіѕe,
    experience and dedication of Michele Ϲarelsе, a Clinical Psychologіѕt.

    I јust had hοpеd that theгe were a lot more options
    than you pοѕted. Exhausted moms, hackneyed exесutiveѕ, finаnciallу twisted homeowners, test anxious students and tгаffiс battling commuteгs on the road, kindly take heeԁ
    to ωhat I need to ѕаy.

    Stop by my web sitе salary expectations clinical psychologists

    ReplyDelete
  12. Write more, thаtѕ аll I haѵe to say.
    Literallу, it seems аѕ though you reliеd on the vidеo to make your point.
    You оbviоusly κnоw whаt youre talκing аbout, why
    waѕte your іntelligence on juѕt pοѕting vidеos
    to your blog when you could be giving us something enlіghtening to
    rеad?

    My hοmepage; Middle school Teachers salary texas

    ReplyDelete