Friday, September 9, 2011

Queenie Is My Tadasana



























They called me Queenie until I turned five, at which time I asked to be called, Betsy; our babysitter's name. 

What if her name had been Esther? 


Mom said it was like calling the dog.
"Dave, Rob, Queenie, Pete! Come on in for supper. Queenie! Out of the sandbox, honey." 


I know this: 


I was never treated like a dog. The only girl in a family of boys, I was cherished by my parents and brothers.


deeply loved, nurtured, protected. 


Well-fed. [see chunky thighs.]


In yoga I encourage my students to find your tadasana, your mountain pose, your steady stance. 


Breathe into standing on your own two feet. 


Gaze forward 
feet planted
no apologies for taking up space


Queenie is my tadasana. 


She is solid, rooted, facing forward. Nary a concern over the size of her thighs (although they did slim down over the years). She doesn't give a shit about thighs. The less clothes, the better. Hats, always. Stripes, nice. A mud-pie maker extraordinaire.


Queenie is well-rounded. 


Thoughtful, curious, happy near water. Loves to be hugged, held close, hair stroked. Laughs easily. Cries easily. Feels deeply. 


Always a thinker, wondering...


What happened to the cat's tail, Mommy? 

(It got slammed in the car door.)


Heart open, easily broken, always wide open.


I've always been fascinated with one's true nature? 
What makes a person that person and how much time we waste squeezing our true nature into tight, tiny places. Shoved to the back of the closet, silenced out of fear of not fitting in, conforming to a job, relationship, school, institution... etc. 


Honoring one's true nature is the path. 


Queenie's always known this. Betsy, on the other hand, has spent too much time waffling and worrying...


over things that never mattered to begin with...


Queenie is my true nature.


Today is Queenie's birthday. 
Betsy's Birthday. 
My birthday.


My wish:


Let Queenie, Betsy, me...


just be.

feet planted
steady gaze
topless?


Happy Birthday, Queenie.


Welcome home.


Here's to finding your tadasana...

8 comments:

  1. Happy Birthday!!!! (COTA, what a nice birthday party!)

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  2. Happiest of birthdays. "Laughs easily. Cries easily. Feels deeply." Sounds familiar but I've never really thought about it that way...thanks so much for the simple realization.

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  3. Thanks so much for stopping by and your birthday wish!!!!
    COTA (our Celebration of the Arts local jazz fest) has always been a great party... xo b

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  4. happy birthday, betsy!! hope you are having one helluva weekend celebration of YOU. I enjoyed our Jazz Fest run in last year, unfortunately or fortunately, not sure yet, i'll be missing it this year. i'm in a 500 hour teacher training program and this is a training weekend. have some fun for me :)

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  6. Just checking in and found your comment.
    Thanks, Leigh Ann. 500 hour training/ awesome!
    Missed seeing you!

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  7. This is my all time favorite, Queenie."Happy Birthday!" I love the thought of what is our true nature? and the image of shoving it to the back of the closet.

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  8. Thanks to all of you for stopping by and checking in! xo b/queenie

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